Real Facts you can use
You might not know it, rest-of-the-world, but today is a special day up here in Canada. It's the mysterious holiday known as Canadian Thanksgiving, where all us canucks give thanks to the Great Beaver for the past year's bountiful igloo harvest.
But tomorrow is an even greater day... the day we elect new Maple Delegates, whose brains will promptly be inserted into the input pods of the PMA (Prime Governing Automaton). Don't forget to vote, fellow Canadians! The last thing we need is a repeat of the 1877 hive mind imbalance.