Erectin' a dispenser

Halloween will soon be upon us! I hope you all have fun costumes lined up. This year, Claire and I decided to go as two red engineers. (For those of you who don't play Team Fortress 2, that was a hilarious joke. Really.)

Remember... hoodies and babydolls will only be available in the new shirt designs until Friday. Friday will also be the last day for whichever one of the Dr. Crab t-shirt colours is the least loved by the world at large. Order now to avoid crushing, irreconcilable disappointment!

Sam Logan

The middle fingers are under the table

Mr. Sin is so forgetful!

A few folks have been asking how long hoodies and babydolls will be available in the new shirt designs . Well, the plan is to keep them on sale until Friday, November 2nd. After that, they'll be toast, as will one of the two Dr. Crab t-shirt colours. (I'm not sure which one... I'll make the decision using the highly artistic method of keeping whichever one is more popular.)

As for the 3-pack, I'm planning on keeping it up until Christmas... but (as probably goes without saying) ordering early is the best way to ensure you get what you want before we run out of stock during the seasonal rush. I'm trying to make sure I have enough of everything, but it is a bit of a hilarious guessing game. Hopefully I've learned something over the last few years!

Sam Logan

A special message from Dr. Crab

We live in a troubled society. Drugs. Murder. Adultery. Violent video games. POG. And today's parents are expected to raise their children in this environment! I know what a challenge that can be. I know first-hand. (Figuratively.)

But I've also overcome that challenge. (Theoretically.) And now I am here to help you do the same. Yes, there is one person who can help guide you through the hurdles of this crazy world. And that person's name is Dr. Phil Dr. Crab.

How, you ask, can I bring Dr. Crab into my life? How can I help Dr. Crab help me? The answer is simple... by purchasing my officially licensed products. The path to inner harmony is paved with commercial purchases, and my product line consists of only the highest quality... uh... cement. Or bricks. Stones. Whatever makes you want to buy them more.

So remember... I am here to help you! But you need to take the first step. The answer to all your problems, my friends, is in your wallet.

I mean, for now.

-Dr. Crab, "PhD"