Boobs and Bots. An Art Thread.

[Bronze]

"I'm sorry, you've probably long since grown tired of my voice, but once I stop talking, the silence will creep through. That is just something I cannot abide."

[Leetmuffin]

Yeah "Abide that" is the correct way.

[Leetmuffin]

English assignment: "Write about your worst memory."
Our teacher is mean.

Anyway

Spoiler: show

I apologized.
We both knew this was coming. It was colder than usual. The air was thick like it was going to rain but no drops fell. I remember her shadow illuminated against the cold gravel like a ghost you haven’t seen since you were a child. My father’s truck was the only light, its rays spread eagle across the driveway. We stood there a long time, frozen regretfully in the moment. I looked into her sparkling emerald eyes the best I could. I’ve never been called a strong guy but I knew this was a time to be strong for her. We had known for a long time this was coming. The situation, the entire world became toxic around us, slowly eroding our time together until the apocalyptic finale, with us standing on the rubble of what used to be. I rubbed my foot in the gravel, trying to end the silence but the quiet clacking only seemed to enhance it. A light breeze drifted between us, establishing the distance. Later that evening I would sit on my bed, and lean against the wall, wearing that old worn school sweatshirt. She always borrowed it and it still smelled like her. A scent, almost gone like a memory. That was when it hit me. It wasn’t during the awkward silence as we stood in the shadows and invisible rain.
I didn’t know what to say. I don’t think I’ll ever know what I should have said. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything. I tried to be nice, it didn’t work. I worsened the moment. I remember she buried her face against my chest to hide her tears. I did my best to comfort her, holding her tightly in my arms. Had I the presence of mind, I would’ve done more. Would’ve thought of more. Yet that’s all I did. We stood there silently once more. My thoughts drifted through my ears like unseen footsteps. Where would we go from here? What will happen to us? I always thought about the moment, never about what happened beyond it. Now that it was happening, I was almost relieved. As relieved as it’s possible to be while you’re holding a crying girl against you, anyway. I said nothing to stop her tears. Nothing would’ve worked, anyway. It was better the next minute, and better the next. After several eternities passed, she took a step back, wiping her nose with her bright green sweatshirt, sniffing loudly in the silence.
I told a joke. It was an awful joke. It was a joke that didn’t belong. It was a zebra in a bar.
She did her best to giggle as I did my best to smile. Her giggle stopped short like a puppet whose strings had been cut. Those green eyes warbled in front of me as she buried her head against me. I awkwardly pat her. I never knew any of this could happen. I never knew anything I would ever do would actually hurt someone. I had a sort of epiphany, finally realizing what everyone meant when they said she cared for me. I never knew until then.
I apologized again.

It lacks focus.

[stock]

Not to hone in on anything, but the lights spread eagle across the driveway creates some pretty strong imagery, I'd be careful with it.

[Leetmuffin]

I don't see it that way.

[Neuvost]

As a creative writing student I've seen a lot of really good writers write some really bad stuff due a problem that I see over and over and over again. They're trying too hard to be "writery." People say that prose is only as good as its poetry. I think that's correct to a certain extent in that problematic poetic writing will ruin a story that if told with simple declarative sentences would be quite fine. You didn't include "lights spread eagle" because it fits, Leet. You included it because it occurred to you and you thought it sounded cool. Metaphors and fine poetry are amazing in the hands of a master, but no story that can't be told without such things and still be amazing should be told at all. Story first. Style second.

The moment meant a lot to you, Leet, and you wanted it to mean a lot to the reader too. And that's tough. I also know it's tough to hear anything but praises sung by a choir of angels who love you when a piece is so personal. But I don't know what you don't see the same way as Stock. You don't see "spread eagle" as strong imagery? You don't think strong imagery is something to be used with care? Don't be ridiculous.

[Leetmuffin]

The assignment was "Your worst memory. Give it very strong imagery, focus on strong images and metaphors."

I do see it as strong imagery. That's why I put it in there. That's the assignment. I just said I don't see it as anything any more than strong imagery. And when I remembered the lights, that's what occurred to me. It is very heavy handed and melodramatic. The metaphors are ridiculous. I was just doing an assignment and thought I'd share it.

[Leetmuffin]

Stuff about my upcoming webcomic:

-It's autobiographical
-Starts with me starting college
-Every chapter is named after a song
-It will be in greyscale except somethings will be in color. It's supposed to be similar to memories with the color bits being whatever part sticks out the most in my mind (A sculpture, a hot girl, someone's really bright eyes, etc)
-Chapter covers will be in full color.
-I still don't have a title
-Everyone's name will be changed, including my own. It was going to be Nash but for simplicities sake, it'll be Issac.
-I chose Issac because it's a cool name.
-I will be updating tuesdays and thursdays although if possible I'd like to move to a Mon/Wed/Fri update schedule.

I have planned out the entire series up to today. Well actually three days ago. Nothing happened today. Since the comic will catch up to me in just over a year, I will be ending it as soon as there's a happy ending available.

Here is the loose plans of the first 10 chapters or so. I'd avert your eyes if you don't want to read it.

Spoiler: show

Chapter One: Holiday
- Introduction arc (Introduce Issac, Joe, Jessica, Improv, and Mary.)
Chapter Two: Crooked Teeth
-Introduce Gloria
-Start Play Arc
Chapter Three: All Over You
-End Play Arc
-Roast Arc (Unresolved Cliffhanger ending)
Chapter Four: Mr. Brightside
-Issac and Gloria's past. (Flashback)
Chapter Five: A Bad Dream pt One.
-Start Party Arc
Chapter Six: A Bad Dream pt Two.
-End Party arc.
Chapter Seven: Selfish Man
-Cartoonist Job introduction
-Introduce Anne
-First Improv show
Chapter Eight: The Most Loneliest Day
-Concert Arc
-Dating Jessica Arc
- The Worst Day ever arc
- Introduce Joe's departure
Chapter Nine: Spaceman
-Climax arc
---End Anne's arc
---Offensive Cartoon Arc
---Huge Improv Show
Chapter Ten: Dashboard
- Joe's Departure
- Issac and Mandy's reconcilation
-Teaching Arc

And that brings us to the present. All the chapters should be a little over a hundred pages, maybe even 150.

[Knight]

There's someone named Improv, really?

[Kelso]

It's good to see your show is getting a comic adaption. I eagerly anticipate it.
Now there just needs to be a game based on the comic, based on the tv show, based on the life.
Maybe a toy line too.

[Knight]

Kelso, you fool! You forgot an anime to advertize the toy.

[Bronze]

And a manga for the anime. Then a live-action box office disaster.

[Leetmuffin]

There's someone named Improv, really?

You can introduce things other than characters you know.

And the webmaster said "So do you think we should make a store for shirts and stuff?"

I laughed.

[ninja-pie]

I'd buy a Leetmuffin: The Life/TV Show/webcomic/paper comic/game/toy line/anime/manga/live-action film shirt. It would be awesome.

[Rock Report Card]

Sometime down the line, Leet, you should definitely have Isaac happen upon your Kickassery character. Just for a shout out to us, the little people.