by MrSquishyDBC » Sun Dec 27, 2009 9:12 am
I started the year in a pretty bad place. One of my best friends became my enemy when he decided to ignore my feelings and ask out the girl I liked, then didn't date her, but effectively poisoned and destroyed my friendship with her. Then I quit my volunteer job assisting at a karate studio and tried to find work in various places. My friendship with the girl started to get repaired, which was a pleasant surprise. I went on the Midnight Run. I got my learner's permit. I climbed a (relatively) small mountain. Then I went to Europe for a wild two and a half weeks. My enemy (who I had pretended to get along with for the sake of preserving friendships and making it easy for everyone) moved to Texas. Started school on a high note. Got my driver's liscense. Started having random, inexplicable fights with the girl, and now our friendship is kinda rocky again. Another very close friend almost killed himself and spent a few weeks in a mental hospital. I joined a band for Battle. Now, at the end of the year, I'm just about the only one of my friends who is single, and I'd like to change that. I'm also getting sick of this town and this school, and I just want to move on and get out.
But the most important thing about this year was that I developed greater sense of freedom and a lot more confidence in myself. I mean, spending nearly three weeks in Europe with friends and litte supervision really made me feel more independent than ever before, but getting my driver's liscense certainly helped as well. And with all the things that made me feel more independent and more free really bumped up my confidence levels, too. I'm much less afraid of things, I'm more confident in myself, and even my friends have said that after Europe I started "acting more like a guy," because frankly, I'm not the manliest man out there. I feel way better about myself in many different ways, and that's pretty rad.
This might not have been my best year overall, though some wonderful things happened. I can say that this was probably the most life changing year for me though, and probably the most important.
I learned two years ago that a year can simultaneously be the best and worst of your life. I guess it's important for bad things to happen so that you don't end up living a sheltered, protected existence. As much as I'd like to fix some of the mistakes I've made, I've taken solice in the face that at least I've learned a lesson from them.
I see you driving
'round town with the girl I love
And I'm like, haiku