...and then there's the fridge logic. Oh my God so much fridge logic. Off the top of my head (MAJOR spoilers follow):
Spoiler: show
-What was the deal with the opening credits? What purpose did showing that Engineer kill himself serve, and why did the toxin work differently on him than anyone else?
-Asshole Geologist becomes a zombie... why, exactly? Again, a totally random scene that makes no sense in the context of the rules they set and adds nothing but a higher body count to the plot.
-FOR FUCK'S SAKE VICKERS JUST TURN LEFT
-Almost everything David does feels like it's arbitrarily dickish for the sole reason that robots in the Alien universe are always dicks. He had a quota to fill, I guess. Though I admit Fassbender fucking killed it with the subtle snarkiness.
-So the Engineers built this weapon on a far off facility from their homeworld for the express purpose of eradicating the human race 3500 years ago. You would think that at some point during those 3500 years the rest of the Engineer species would notice humans aren't dead and maybe, I dunno, try again? Oops, we had a chemical spill. Bag the whole shindig, guys, pack it up.
-For that matter, what kind of shitty plan is the chemical weapon, anyway? You create a toxin that will disintegrate your DNA within 24 hours if ingested, and while infected if you have sex your sperm turns into a Face Hugger? You're a race of super-powered giants trying to kill cave-men, you stupid fucks, just shoot a laser at them or something.
-And of course, the big reveal! The Xenomorphs were genetically engineered by the Space Jockey. Pants shitting moment, right? Oh man, now we know what the Xenomorphs really are! Except, you know, that implies that the ship from the original Alien was a totally different Engineer ship that also was carrying the toxin, fucked up its transport, infected someone, that someone got laid while infected, and then THAT resulting mutant demon baby managed to stick a tentacle down someone's throat. That justifies the first Alien. Where there's one. Throw in the entire race of them and it makes zero sense. The only way that this "big reveal" could possibly work is if Prometheus was its own continuity branching from the first film, and even then it's a shit show because that implies there were multiple Engineer ships all carrying the toxin and not a single one made it to Earth.
-Asshole Geologist becomes a zombie... why, exactly? Again, a totally random scene that makes no sense in the context of the rules they set and adds nothing but a higher body count to the plot.
-FOR FUCK'S SAKE VICKERS JUST TURN LEFT
-Almost everything David does feels like it's arbitrarily dickish for the sole reason that robots in the Alien universe are always dicks. He had a quota to fill, I guess. Though I admit Fassbender fucking killed it with the subtle snarkiness.
-So the Engineers built this weapon on a far off facility from their homeworld for the express purpose of eradicating the human race 3500 years ago. You would think that at some point during those 3500 years the rest of the Engineer species would notice humans aren't dead and maybe, I dunno, try again? Oops, we had a chemical spill. Bag the whole shindig, guys, pack it up.
-For that matter, what kind of shitty plan is the chemical weapon, anyway? You create a toxin that will disintegrate your DNA within 24 hours if ingested, and while infected if you have sex your sperm turns into a Face Hugger? You're a race of super-powered giants trying to kill cave-men, you stupid fucks, just shoot a laser at them or something.
-And of course, the big reveal! The Xenomorphs were genetically engineered by the Space Jockey. Pants shitting moment, right? Oh man, now we know what the Xenomorphs really are! Except, you know, that implies that the ship from the original Alien was a totally different Engineer ship that also was carrying the toxin, fucked up its transport, infected someone, that someone got laid while infected, and then THAT resulting mutant demon baby managed to stick a tentacle down someone's throat. That justifies the first Alien. Where there's one. Throw in the entire race of them and it makes zero sense. The only way that this "big reveal" could possibly work is if Prometheus was its own continuity branching from the first film, and even then it's a shit show because that implies there were multiple Engineer ships all carrying the toxin and not a single one made it to Earth.
So yeah. There's that.
This movie was pretty fucked up.. but great at the same time.
